Two of the many questions I had when contemplating returning to Nepal: "Will Nepal have me?" and "Am I even for Nepal?"
Having lived in as many countries outside as I had, I felt I could be accepted by any place and people. But will I be accepted in Nepal and by the Nepalis?
In Feb. 2013, I turned down a, international teaching job offer to follow through with my plans to return to Nepal for good, after more than two decades abroad. I had many reasons for doing so. One was to see if Nepal was still my home, and, if not, if I could make it my home.
As a primary school student, I loved the arts and was good at acting and singing, and did a lot of that. But acting was also an "out," a means to escape my own self, to become someone else, suffering as I had been from a number of personal issues.
Had I been born a different caste or in a different country, I would have probably become a performing artist as an adult.
One of the many issues I identified growing up in Nepal, which I believed would be the source of many unwarranted struggles to make something of myself, had been my severe lack of social capital. So, I worked really hard to escape from the country. Succeeding in doing so and spending most of my adult life abroad, I practically ensured I would have even less social capital when I finally returned home! #LifeEh!
Another #LifeEh observation. This one about how I did everything I could to leave behind, "escape" from, and rise above the yoke of the Bhote label...only to return to Nepal as a middle-aged man after spending pretty much all my adult life abroad studying, working, and traveling just to discover I have come full circle!
Since 1990, little by little, my people from the little village of Tangbe in Mustang District have been reclaiming their identity. Here's one of the ways they are doing that.